Crying it out obsesses you.
You can't get it off your mind... you keep hearing about this magic book or that miraculous system that promises to get your baby to sleep through the night. All you need to do is suck it up. You keep hearing about all these babies who magically sleep.
You don't believe your baby should cry and can't find anyone who gets what you are going through.
You are desperate.
Your friends and family say that all your problems will be solved with a firm schedule and letting him cry-it-out. You listen longingly to other mother's seductive tales:
"Just 3 nights of crying and now he sleeps through the night."
The bottom line is this: you can't stand to hear your baby cry.
In your heart, you know there is a way that feels right and works but you don't know how. You feel you will have to suffer until your child is older. You may be feeling any combination of exhaustion, doubt, defensiveness, anger and shame.
You have searched online and tried to let your baby self-soothe.
You have googled "baby sleep" dozens of times, read all the books, gotten unsettling advice from your doctor, friends and relatives. You are discouraged and exhausted with the results. Your baby still doesn't sleep. Probably, you are conflicted and confused about "THE RIGHT WAY" to sleep.
The biggest reason those didn't work.
Most people don't understand that your baby already knows how to sleep. What really needs to happen is that YOU need to learn how to let your baby sleep.
And, when you do that, you and your baby are going to sleep better, be happier and in sync with each other.
"It wasn't what I expected. It was a completely natural process. Bedtime feels right now."
Sleeping can be a completely natural process.
And as you have found, sometimes it's not simple. If you are losing out on sleep, it is probably one or maybe several things together that need adjusting. There are lots of things that can contribute to exhaustion and bad sleep habits.
It's not always what you think:
"In hindsight, it all makes sense. My husband and I were so tense and had so much
riding on "The Schedule," there was no way she could relax and actually sleep."
Going to sleep is like going on a journey.
You prepare so you can relax and enjoy your trip. You set a destination, make a list of what you need, pack, and you double check, so that you when you set off on your trip, you are completely confident that the stove is off, the door is locked and your favorite pillow is under your arm.
And just like going on a trip, some families figure it out on their own, while others like a little help from a tour guide.
"What a relief to have found Donna. We had no idea where to start. We had so many
problems and we were arguing every night about what the right thing to do was."
I've spent plenty of nights awake.
When my kids were babies I tried everything to get more sleep. I did everything that you have done. In the end, I decided that the best thing to do was to give up and not worry about it. I went to bed at 8:00 pm, got out of bed at 8:00 am and after a week, the world was a happier place. Almost.
I still didn't know why my babies didn't sleep.
I was talking to my Resonance Repatterning practitioner and she said, "It's because you don't resonate with babies sleeping." At that moment, I shifted my way of thinking about infant sleep and started shifting my resonance with sleep.
Through six years of working with parents using Resonance Repatterning for sleep problems, I can tell you there is no one way or magic to getting a baby to sleep. Your baby or child, like all human beings will sleep when they feel relaxed and safe.
You may be wondering if you need some help.
In my experience, if you fit one or more of these situations, you could use some extra help:
- You can't function more than one or two days in a week.
- Your baby or child is fussy, irritable, cranky, and has melt-downs.
- Your baby is a year old and you still get up every hour or two.
- You think that your baby or child hates sleeping or doesn't need to sleep.
- You are "So Frikkin' Confused about "THE RIGHT WAY" to sleep.
- You have been told that you are ruining your child's sleep habits.
- Your baby is sleeping and you are wide-eyed, checking Facebook and shopping on Amazon.
Here's how I work with clients:
We start with a 30 minute Sleep Session to figure out what you are needing: We talk about what is working and what is not working. It's a Phone, Skype or office visit — whatever works best for you.
If you've decided you do want a Sleep Session, here's what you WON'T get: "My Way or the Highway" attitude, crying it out, one size fits all strategies, unanswered questions, stressful sleep protocols, "old-school" approaches that don't work and rules about where you have to sleep or not sleep.
You can call or email to ask a question or schedule an appointment for your Sleep Session. (845) 750-4402
At the end of the Sleep Session you will have:
- At least one new skill for your next close encounter of the sleepless kind.
- A new awareness of what is causing the sleepless nights. (It is probably not what you think!)
- A renewed sense of hope about getting more sleep (and you'll know when it's time to get more help.)
- A "next-step" action plan for getting more sleep without compromising your baby's trust in you.
- NO crying it out.
During that Sleep Session, we will talk about what you want and don't want with your sleep situation. I will give you my perspective on what is happening. You may feel that you have received enough information and you feel empowered to try on your own. You may decide you want to work further with me on your sleep problems. You may decide that how I work is not for you. Whatever you decide is fine with me.
Here are my Policies:
- I will do my best to get sleeping right for you and your family.
- I will bring sensitivity, love and caring into every interaction.
- I will work with you if you are in a financial constriction.
- I want sleeping to work for you and your Family, not for some "Four Star", A++, Nightmarish Dream that Someone ... Somewhere ... had Sometime ...
Here are my standards:
- I fully expect that you and your family can sleep better.
- You and your family's opinions, culture, and lifestyle will be respected when we work together.
- You are the expert in your family (even if sometimes you don't feel like it!) You set the pace and decide if you like something or don't.
- Your situation, problem, solution, and story are private.
Here is my "No More Tears Guarantee": I am not perfect, and I am here to serve you. I'll be the first to tell you that I don't know everything there is to know about sleeping. If something is not right, please tell me, I'll find a way to make it right.
"I know what my baby needs and I am willing to do it, but I need my time, too!"
Getting enough sleep is vital for your physical, mental and emotional health. Improving your baby's sleep is probably the biggest way you can have more time in your life. Rested babies and children are happier, better behaved and are more fun to be with. Studies show that people who get enough sleep are happier, eat healthier, score better on cognitive tests and are healthier overall.
You'll put the agony and indecision behind you. You will feel confident that you are doing the right thing every time your child goes to bed.
To start getting more sleep right away, call (845) 750-4402
Drop me an email and tell me what's going on and I will get back to you within 24 hours.